Some of you will have read this elsewhere, but I'll post it here anyway...

Grammie is doing okay, but it varies from day to day. She was having a really good day when I was there last Monday. She seems to be getting mixed up on her meds -- either not taking some, or thinking she's taken them when she hasn't, etc. She has several meds, to be taken at different times, and she thinks she has it straight, but then gets confused. A home-care nurse was coming to see her to help get all that straightened around for her. When she has the meds straight, then she feels quite a bit better. Otherwise she's in pain, nauseous and can't eat. She's lost a ton of weight, is down to maybe 100 lbs.

She lives on her own, in a small suite in a senior's "complex" I guess you'd call it. A number of suites, with a common lounge area. The other residents keep an eye on her and are wonderful to her, but she knows that she is at a point now where she needs more care. After being violently sick to her stomach at 4:00 in the morning, alone...... she doesn't want to be alone anymore. So she's waiting to get into palliative care in a nursing home across the street from where she lives.

As I mentioned in a previous post, the doctor says that the cancer may have spread to her lungs.

One funny point -- or at least my family with our warped sense of humor thinks it's funny -- is that the doctor told her that she is eligible to qualify for medicinal marijuana (which is legal here) for the pain and nausea. So we've had numerous and ongoing laughs about Grammie smokin' up.... lol. (I have no idea if she'll actually apply for it, but it's made for some laughs, anyway. )

I'm glad that we had a good visit, I feel more at peace now. Thanks everyone for your prayers and hugs. They are very much appreciated. :)

Oh, and my brother is flying out in a couple of weeks to see Grammie. I may go down that weekend as well.

On another note, I've been trying to do more walking lately. At this time it's more for my physical health than my mental/emotional/spiritual... although it helps with all of those, too! :D In the past, I'd say it was more for those reasons. Anyway, I bought myself some new shoes the other day, and I'm going to try keeping a bit of a fitness log, just to (hopefully) keep me motivated. I really would like to lose a few pounds as well. Darn, but that middle-age thing has a way of sneaking up on a person.... :P

I'm working on some summer vacation plans... a couple of weeks in Arizona. I've never taken two full weeks off from work.... lol. I used to just take a week in the summer, and use the rest of my vacation time up here and there throughout the year.

The youth held 30-Hour Famine at our church this weekend. We only have a couple of youth at our church. My niece (she's 22) leads a youth group at the Baptist church (which kids from all denominations attend) -- and she has organized and lead the 30-Hour Famine for the past 4 years at our church, with kids from the youth group participating. There were 17 kids and 3 leaders taking part this year. They did the readings in church this morning and had a short presentation. It was really good. They got fed tacos when they were done fasting, later this afternoon. ;)

*~*~*~*~*
Currently playing: The River ~ Live
Tonight's walk: 40 minutes

Good day

I'll probably write more later, but for now I wanted to say that I had a really good day with both my grandma and my aunt. Grammie was having a better day -- I think they got her straightened out on her meds -- so that was good. It was just a good day all around. :-)

Grammie update

I posted this on the Ship, but for those who don't go there...

Grammie was in emergency for 6 hours yesterday -- she'd been very sick to her stomach during the night, hadn't eaten for a day and a half, was dehydrated, potassium levels were low... She's down to about 100 lbs.

The doctor thinks the cancer may have spread to her lungs. :'(

I'm going down to see her tomorrow.

Tagged...

I just read Carmel's xanga, and I see that I've been tagged... lol. I have to tell you 6 things about myself....

1. Other than a weekends/summer job that I had when I was in high school, my current job is the only (paid!) one I've had. I was a stay-at-home mom for many years, and started working as an assistant librarian in1997, for one year. I then moved to Branch Librarian, and have been in this position for almost 8 years now. I love my job -- most of the time! ... lol.

2. I have two middle names. My brother and sister, my three kids, and my sister's three kids all have two middle names. :-)

3. The past few years were in many ways ones of difficulty, but they were also ones of great learning, growth and new life. I have faced fears, had to look at my own faults and failings, been reminded of the need to forgive, stepped out in faith (despite the fears), learned a great deal about myself and others, found strength and courage as well as acceptance and love and friendship. Life is good. :-)

4. Unlike my daughter (who Josh calls my gyspy), I've never been very adventurous. I still live in the same small town I grew up in, and never went far from it -- definitely didn't venture anywhere alone... lol. In the past two years, though, I've travelled 3 times to the States to see friends, and those have been some of the most special times of my life. I miss my friends, and hope to one day see them again. For now, though, my excursions will be taking me only to Arizona. ;-)

5. I don't drive, have never driven in my life. Most people think that is so weird, and you have no idea how many people have told me that they could teach me, they could get me to drive.... lol. Well, it hasn't worked yet, but it is something I at least think about now... It is weird, it's really a phobia, but maybe it's one that I can overcome. We'll see...... ;-)

6. I am not a morning person. Even as a baby, I was up half the night -- my poor mom, because my older brother was a morning person, and would be up at the crack of dawn. I don't think she ever got any sleep. (Sorry, Mom!) I'm still a night owl, and love to sleep in whenever I can. Mornings can be made better, however, with a good cup of coffee. :D


Oh, almost forgot.... I need to tag some others. I tag Amy, John, Kathy, Alan, Slyvia and Steph. (Matt, in case you haven't seen, Carmel tagged you as well. ;-) )

As I mentioned in my comment for the previous post, Robbie and I didn't get down to see my grandma... we were both sick. Will try again.

Lana's dad fell today, and had to go by ambulance -- first to hospital here, then to Saskatoon. He hit his head, and they thought he might have had a stroke. He's not getting enough oxygen (he has terminal lung cancer), and from what Randi understood he is sort of in a coma. I don't really have details, but it is not looking good at all. Lana will stay up in Saskatoon with him.... Randi said that they were told he may not make it through the night. :-( For those so inclined, prayer would be welcome.

Holy Week

Sunday was Palm Sunday, the beginning of Holy Week. We were doing a dramatic reading in church that morning, and I was thinking about the movie "The Passion of the Christ". Those scenes play in my head now when I hear or read the related scripture. I'm not sure if that is good or not. It is someone else's visualization rather than my own. And yet, it helps in some ways to make it more "real". I dunno...

I watched "The Passion" last year on Good Friday. Still gut-wrenchingly emotional. I hadn't seen it since the year before when it came out, and I went opening week in the theatre. That was interesting. I went by myself, but at the same time as a long-distance friend, and then we discussed it later that night. It was very good, an interesting discussion.

We have 3 services this week -- Maundy Thursday, including the foot-washing (we never have very many people out for that service, and it looks like there will be even less this year, possibly only a handful), the ecumenical Good Friday service (this year at the Pentecostal church), and the Saturday Easter Vigil. One of my favorites (that one and Christmas Eve). We have two churches in our parish, and our congregation has the Easter Vigil, the other congregation has the Easter morning service.

Robbie and I might drive down to see my grandma on Friday, since we have the day off. We've been trying to find a weekend when he's not working/not away. It hasn't been working out so well. I could go down by myself, but she really wants to see Robbie, she hasn't seen him for years, so I'd like us to go together. Sheldon and his dad went this past weekend.

My mom called me yesterday morning to let me know that my grandma has made the decision that she is not comfortable living on her own anymore. Between the cancer and the possibility of her bad hip giving out at any time, she feels she needs to be somewhere where she can be taken care of. She has her name on a waiting list for a palliative care bed in a nursing home.

She got pain and anti-nausea meds less than two weeks ago, and is already having to up the dosage on both of them.... She is able to eat now, at least, but is still losing weight. As much as I hate to lose her, I also don't want this to drag on for a long time if she is in pain..... :-(

Chantelle's plans for Australia are coming together. She should be able to book her flight soon. She's planning to come home for a visit in August, and then leave forAustralia in Sept. Man, I am going to miss her. I already miss her, being 7 hours away, but at least now we can talk on the phone any time (thank goodness for a great long distance plan!). Oh well... I know that she is going to have an amazing time, and I am very happy for her. :-)

I'm going to a meeting at the school tonight. There is a young woman who moved to town recently who will be speaking -- she's a recovering crystal meth addict. The local school board has put on a number of drug information presentations in the past few years, but I think that hearing it straight from someone who has been there and lived it is very powerful. Her mom and an addictions counsellor will be there for support. I hope that there is a good turnout.

Okay, back to work. I started this update on Sunday but got interrupted and didn't finish it.... lol. I decided I should get it posted today.